Trying to get pregnant again after a loss - for dads and partners
After losing a baby, it can be difficult to decide whether to try to get pregnant again. You may be worried about your partner going through another pregnancy or losing another baby. It’s a very personal decision and what’s right for one person or family may not be right for another.
When to start trying for another baby
Deciding when to start trying again is individual to you and your partner. There’s no ‘right time’.
It can take time to feel emotionally ready. One of you may want to start trying again sooner than the other. Try to keep talking to each other about how you both feel and see your GP if you’re worried about how you’re coping.
Your partner will need time to recover physically before trying again. The midwife or pregnancy health doctor (obstetrician) can give you both advice on this. You may also want to wait for the results of any tests that may have been done after your loss.
The hospital staff may have given you information about trying to get pregnant again. For example, when to start trying, the likelihood of getting pregnant and the risks involved. Contact them or your GP if you would like to talk more about this.
Pregnancy after a loss can be difficult. You may feel excited or relieved that you’re trying again, but also worried about how a new pregnancy will progress. We have more detailed information about trying again after a miscarriage, stillbirth or neonatal loss.
We also have more information about money and work for dads and partners.
Getting support
You and your partner may want to speak to the GP if you have any questions about trying to get pregnant again.
You can also talk to a Tommy’s midwife for free. You can call them on 0800 0147 800, 9am to 5pm, Monday to Friday. Or you can email them at [email protected]
It's not uncommon to experience mental health difficulties after baby loss. It can affect dads and partners too. Some people continue to have negative feelings and physical symptoms after a traumatic event, such as losing a baby. For example, flashbacks, nightmares, angry outbursts and sleep problems can all be signs of post-traumatic stress.
If you’re worried about how you or your partner are coping, talk to the GP or midwife, even if your loss happened a long time ago. It’s never too late to ask for help.
- Due C, Chiarolli S, Riggs DW (2017) The impact of pregnancy loss on men's health and wellbeing: a systematic review. BMC Pregnancy Childbirth 2017; 17(1): 380.
- NICE (2021). Pre-conception - advice and management: Scenario: Pre-conception advice for all women. NICE Clinical Knowledge Summary. National Institute for Health and Care Excellence https://cks.nice.org.uk/topics/pre-conception-advice-management/management/advice-for-all-women/
- NICE (2020). Miscarriage: Scenario: Follow up after a miscarriage. NICE Clinical Knowledge Summary. National Institute for Health and Care Excellence https://cks.nice.org.uk/topics/miscarriage/management/follow-up-after-a-miscarriage/
- Sands (2020). National Bereavement Care Pathway. Neonatal death: full guidance document. Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Society https://nbcpathway.org.uk/sites/default/files/2020-02/Neonatal%20Death%20Full%20Guidance_Jan%202020_0.pdf
Read stories from other dads and partners
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Neonatal death stories
We set up a nature retreat in memory of our son
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Miscarriage stories
Dads uniting together
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Partner loss stories
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Miscarriage stories
Reflecting on loss from a non-bio mother's perspective
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Baby loss stories
My wife and I grieved differently when our daughter died
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Miscarriage stories
The ‘M’ word
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Stillbirth stories
After my daughter was stillborn, I made her a promise to help others
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Neonatal death stories
Having our son taken away so abruptly left us broken, with many unanswered questions